Saturday, September 11, 2010

Has it been nine years? My memory is clear.

Even nine years later my memory of September 11th is still clear.

I was born in New York. I grew up in New York.
I was sitting in study hall when it happened.
I remember my classmates crying- a number had lost family members.
I remember my teachers crying- a number had lost family members.
I remember the line to the pay phone with desperate cries to parents.
Cell phones weren't working correctly from the destruction.
I remember the candle light vigil and the fear.
I remember the silence when the 'no fly zone' was put into effect.
Who knew that airplane noise was something we were used to?
Something that would frighten us when planes returned?
I remember the rusted sunsets.
The scent of ash in the air.
I remember the police waiting at the train station.
Waiting to log which cars sat overnight, people who had not come home.
Firemen rushing to aide, losing their fellow heros.
I remember seeing the tears on newscasters faces. 
Newscasters are meant to remain emotionless no longer had control.
I remember the confusion and desperate need for news:
we only had one channel on the tv, the rest we lost because the satellites were on the towers.
I remember hearing that a friends brother was being deployed.
The first time I ever knew someone, in my life time, who was going to war.

Sometimes, I still have a nightmare... maybe once a year.
Where I relive that day. 
I never wrote a journal entry about it.
Why would I when I can remember it perfectly?
I was trapped at school, I was desperate to escape.
Our car was broken down and they wouldn't let me leave unless a parent signed me out.
My mother was picked up by my best friends mom
they came and rescued me and my friend.
I went to her house and watched the news.
It was an Arabic news station.
My best friend and her family are Muslim.
And we sat, shocked, scared, and in complete awe.
We could not understand what the newscasters said on the Arabic station.
We only spoke English.
But we could understand the images of the crying people.
The people gathering to pray.
Candles being lit.
Worse images then that.

I remember it as if it was yesterday.
Nine years later.
My memory is clear.

The time of this post was intentional.

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